An exploration of South Eastern Australia by Clem Byard.
You can follow HookTurn on Bluesky (the account was previously called “WeirdMelbs”).
Contact: clem.byard@icloud.com
Header image: Melbourne Hook Turn Signs (collage) by the author.
Bonfire Night
Remember, remember
The fifth of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot
It was once common to have a bonfire on the night of 5th of November in your backyard in suburban Melbourne. Then in 1982 the government banned fireworks and the tradition, with roots in the Gunpowder Plot of 1605, died out.
I can remember Mum helping my brothers and me to make an effigy of Guy Fawkes out of an old shirt of Dad’s, stuffed with newspaper. Dad would buy fireworks at the local milk bar — rockets, fountains and Catherine wheels.
These days being caught with a Roman candle is punishable by being hanged, drawn and quartered (or 15 years in jail).
The Road to Wonthaggi
Which way would you go to get to Wonthaggi?
If you answered “drive straight on”, congratulations, you passed the test.
If you answered “take the next exit”, then . . . welcome to Choose Your Own Adventure: South Gippsland Edition.
Maceless in Melbourne
On this day, 9th October 1891, the ceremonial mace of the Parliament of Victoria was stolen.
One lurid story has it the stolen mace was used as the centrepiece of a mock parliament held in a brothel in Little Lonsdale Street.
A $50,000.00 reward is remains on offer for its safe return.
AFL Grand Final Kukai
Every year Rob Scott and the Australian Haiku Society (HaikuOZ) host an AFL Grand Finial Day Kukai: a string of AFL Grand Final related haiku which anyone is welcome to join.
The Maribynong Blenny
When the 2006 Commonwealth Games were held in Melbourne a series of sculptures of fish and other marine creatures were commissioned to be carried on barges down the Yarra River.
After the games many were given to local councils, and while the current locations of some of the sculptures is known, the fate others is a mystery. I have a fancy it might be fun to try to track them down and visit as many as I can find.
More information about the sculptures is available on the website Melbourne Playgrounds.
NOTE: If you compare the photo of the Seychelles Blenny on the Melbourne Playgrounds website to the one I took today you’ll see that over the past 20 years the Blenny has shed a couple of its fins.
Shandygaff
I popped into the KFL Asian Supermarket in Newmarket yesterday and came across cans of Anglia “The Real Shandy” (less than 1% alcohol).
Drinking shandies, a mix of beer and lemonade, was once common in Australia, but it is decades since I last heard someone order one. These days people looking for low alcohol alternatives have a range of low-, mid- and alcohol–free beers to choose from.
Unfortunately, the canned Anglia shandy is not much good — not enough beer. Try making your own at home instead: a ratio of two-thirds beer to one-third lemonade should be about right, but tweak the recipe to suit your own taste.